4-02-05
4-09-05
4-23-05
4-30-05
Mailbag: Week of 4-30-05
Why do you care?
Krem R Us

Feel free to publically display my E-mail adress.

-Krem


Okay.

-SV

BOKTAI...er, reply

I care...just because. Really. I don't know why I reply to mailbag every other week. Maybe I should just stop caring. Maybe...

Nah.

Even though I can't come up with a creative answer, I thought this topic sorta rocked in its own way.

Maybe THAT's why I care.

I dunno.

Peace.

-Allthesmallthings


Don't worry about coming up with a creative answer. I usually can't come up with a creative topic, but as long as people reply I have to keep coming up with random crap.

-SV

PAHAS?

Screw you and you're ways of pointing out everything I do wrong.

I CARE BECAUSE I ALWAYS WANT TO BE RIGHT! PAHAS!

-StarKirby


Maybe next time I have a story thing like that (but definitely for only 1 week) you'll include every part and I won't have to correct you. :P

And what the hell is "PAHAS"?

-SV

False advertizement

I don't, really.

Although this section of the "about" thing makes me wonder... "And replying to mailbag isn't without reward to you! If I feel like you've contributed a lot to mailbag (many submissions, great content, etc.), you can earn a badge on the forums!"

Has anyone ever actually received one of these? Perhaps if I respond to every mailbag ever, I could get one? Or was it just a false claim? FIND OUT ON CNN

P.S. my story will come true one day

-GSGold


Yes, stareyE, Rick, and Allthesmallthings have received the badge, but Soap hasn't set up the badge thing on the new forums (if it's possible), so I can't give any new ones out right now. It's a coincidence that you asked about it since I was planning on sitting down tonight and counting how many submissions have ever been made by anyone to mailbag and setting certain amount of submissions to be made to receive the badge (in case Soap makes forum badges possible again).

P.S. To top off my cliche weekend: Just keep dreaming and reach for the stars...or something like that.

-SV

My major!

Because, Scott, you make the world go round :D or was that Root Beer... I can't remember...

-UnbrokenTorment


Actually, that has a lot more to do with the physics of gravity and our orbiting the sun than rootbeer or me.

-SV

Minority rights

Because I feel that it's only right that penguins get a fair trial and are innocent until proven guilty. This world is just so corrupt these days that I can't believe how penguins manage to live in these harsh environments. Please! Please! Just think of the penguins!

-Static2007


To be honest, I'm racist against penguins. Everyone knows penguins are just a bunch of dirty liars. When one of 'em uses their wings to actually fly, then I might change my mind.

-SV

Read. Now.

Douglas Adams, he wrote Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, didn't he? I've really got to read that, it sounds awesome.

This week's topic is quite a coincedence, seeing as just a few days ago I bought myself a new hoodie that says, "Ask me if I care. Go 'head, just ask me." I also got one which says "I can only please one person each day. Today is not your day. Tommorow doesn't look good either." Both of which have been quite popular with the large group of people who stop me everyday to read my shirt. I have a large collection of shirts like that.

Why do I care? I dunno. Somebody else probably told me I was supposed to care and I didn't have any good reason to disagree, so I went along with it.

-stareyE


You definitely need to read the Hitchhiker's series, then go see the movie. Now.

-SV

This week in review.

I know it doesn't look like I care with my always updating late, but stuff happens. All of you know that because it happens to you too. You can't always be somewhere when you need to be, but here the old cliche stands true: Better late than never.

Don't forget to reply to next week's mailbag!

-SV

Mailbag: Week of 4-23-05
Write a short story using POS members that in some way includes a car chase and crash and something that shouldn't explode exploding.
Weird Canadians

It was a dark and stormy night in downtown Tokyo. So that meant it was the middle of the day at the POS and the storm was just in Tokyo. Actually it was only lightly raining at the POS, but still enough that Static's burning of things was being stifled. So she got Rick to rent a car so they could go somewhere where it was not wet, and she could burn stuff.

Unfortunately, when he came back to the POS to get her, he ran over a porcupine which managed to puncture the gas tank, so STAREYe had to install rockets into the back of the car. In reality, he was going to do it anyway when nobody was looking, but this way caused so much less of an uproar/banning from Rick.

Right about this time, the Royal Canadian Mounted Bunchies came by looking for Krem, saying something about a 'noodle incident somewhere in the Yukon. Hahaha, like bunchies can even talk. Okay so it was some regular police guys. And one police chick.

So then Rick and Static and STAREYe (who was sitting on the roof) drove off, and the police noticed Krem hiding in the back seat, and that those were stolen rockets. I'm not really sure how they could tell that, but they definatly knew it. This resulted in that car chase which was a required part of the story. There was a lot of swerving and Rick swearing and Static flamthrowering the police and STAREYe launching bottle rockets at them and Krem lashing out with his cold whip of sarcasm.

Then the police crashed into a Taco Bell, and all the nachos exploded, and the day was saved. And STAREYe asked the police chick out and got slapped.

Well, that wasn't half bad considering I made it up as I went along.

-stareyE


I love your writing; it reminds me a lot of Douglas Adams' stuff. It's so random, yet funny and it somehow makes sense. You should write more.

-SV

Texas has had a rough 4 1/3 years...

Once apon a time, there was a little medow where POS members went to frolic and dance the trout in their pants dance and kill innocent creatures that are insanely cute and cuddly. Anyways, one time when they killed one of the innocent creatures that are insanely cute and cuddly, a puppet in the shape of Texas appeared and told the POS members that as punishment for killing the innocent creatures that are insanely cute and cuddly, they must be shipped to the local looney bin. Fortunatly, the POS members have already been to the local looney bin, so they knew the way out.

In the middle of the afternoon, they go to break out. Why bother going out at night when people are expecting you to make a grand escape anyways? They had this light show and special effects and everything to make it a grand escape and simply leaped out of a nearby window to escape. They all got into a car and drove away from the local looney bin.

However, the puppet in the shape of Texas saw this and was very angered, so he chased after them with his Cobalt Chevey that wasn't a cobalt color. They drove and chased and hit innocent creatures that are insanely cute and cuddly along the way when the members of POS got a great idea of how to stop the puppet in the shape of Texas.

About two minutes after they got the plan to stop the puppet in the shape of Texas, one of the POS members stood up in the car and randomly screamed, "I SUMMON THEE... MR. PEANUT!" Mr. Peanut appeared and leaped into the Cobalt Chevey that wasn't a cobalt color and attacked the puppet in the shape of Texas. The puppet in the shape of Texas screamed for mearcy as he accidentally ran into a flag pole.

The flag pole said, "This pole will self destruct in 20 hours, 24 minutes, and 42 seconds." Mr. Peanut hurried out of the car to duck and cover while the puppet in the shape of Texas screamed again and kept the constant screaming until the flag pole exploded.

So the members of POS went back to their beautiful medow, where they froliced and danced the trout in their pants dance and killed innocent creatures that are insanely cute and cuddly. The end!

-Static2007


Yay! I love stories that can effectively use repeating phrases. All that was missing was a reference to GSGold attempting to take over the meadow. >.>

-SV

Nobody cares about your birthday >:O

Deciding to update a day before my B-day, eh?

Okay, so, Rick was dancing in the street in a tutu for nickles, when Nick ran out and told Rick to get off his lawn. Rick then jumped into his car and drove off. But he had forgotten all the nickles people gave him - in pity - and schreeched to a stop. Nick had grabbed each nickle, including Jordan, the coolest nickle out thar, and ran inside. Rick ran backwards in the street, running over SK's and Krem's on his way. 'DAMNED TEENAGERS!' He'd yell. Rick then arrive at Nick's, but Rick's via-cel had fallen into a enormous manhole planted by STAREYe, crashing into the sewage water below. STAREYe then popped out of it and exclaimed "And for a purchase of 12 cans of Lanada, you'll get this free Barbie poster with a monthly fee of 12 dollars in Euros!" Rick replied with a loud, obnoxious "OMF" and kick-banned STAREYe to the head. Nick had baracaded the door, and Rick's squeeky rubber key could not open his lock. Rick tossed it into the manhole, as it exploded in a long verticle pillar, evaporating STAREYe's hat, and Rick's via-cel. Rick blew his 10 foot long whistle, and Static rolled in with a foot-tall tank, followed by her army of severed toes. They all lead an attack on Nick's, the toes eating the walls, Rick stabbing the doorway and the tank to shoot out spoiled eggs at the windows. The front door finally fell, and Rick ran inside.

...

"This isn't Nick's house."

"Uh...I think SV's gonna be mad when he gets back."

And they were never seen again.

Insert random referance about Soap and Sommie here.

The End!

-StarKirby


Sometime next week you will receive a package. In that package will be a small grey cube with a large red button on one side. Press the button firmly; I'll You'll enjoy the surprise inside. Really.

But seriously, you forgot the car chase scene, but your reference to Rick dancing in a tutu for nickles makes up for it.

-SV

The definition of fiction

Short story eh? Well here's one for you. It's called "The Great Awesome"
---
GSGold looks down from his balcony. He had did it. The fight was rough, the battles nearly impossible, but he had finally did it. He had taken over The Daily POS. "HURRY UP DOWN THERE!" He shouted, throwing several rocks at Slave 47, once known as Rick. "AND MAKE IT SHINE!" This couldn't be better. He had statues dedicated to him, there was no way that he could be overthrown. And yet there was still a problem. Those four, what were their names...Static, Rick...insomniacdude, and Anti. That was it. They were not working as hard as they should have. GSGold's rule has only been for about two weeks and already everyone but those four have given up on "freedom" and "rebelling". But today, that's going to change. They need to be eliminated. "YOU FOUR! IN THERE!" GSGold shouted into his megaphone, pointing toward a house. It was once SoaponaRoap's house, but now it's simply a prison. All four of them knew what was going to happen, but armored soldiers made them walk inside. Laughing at himself about what is going to happen, GSGold pressed a large red button labeled "Press this button to make stuff go boom". Something did, indeed, go boom. "FOR THE REST OF YOU, IF YOU DON'T FOLLOW MY ORDERS, THAT'S WHERE YOU'LL END UP!" All the once-named slaves looked at the inferno, almost in tears. --- God I love this story.

-GSGold


I don't know where you live, but the authorities do. Please, it'll be so much easier if you go peacefully. All they want to do is ask you a few questions...

Disclaimer: No car chase scene. >:OOOOOOOOO



Hehe...slave 47...XD

-SV

Short and sweet

One day STAREYe was out for a drive, going to pick up the latest copy of "Communism and You" from the Black Market, when all of the sudden, Mary Poppins drifted from the sky, and landed on his hood. She cleared her throat, and spoke, "Mighty fine day it is!" and she exploded, causing STAREYe to spin out of control and and into a Black Mage, who cast Firaga on him out of rage.

The End :DDDD

-UnbrokenTorment


Wow, that was concise. It's good except that you are the third person in a row to forget the car chase...

Now I can't get the image of my head; a huge supermarket painted in black with large yellow letters: "Black Market: for all your "special" needs."

-SV

This week in review.

I think that no matter what the topic, everyone manages to reply within 3 or 4 days. I rarely get last minute replies. Oh well, the stories this week are awesome. If I didn't already save all mailbags on my computer I would save these stories separately. Thanks for good reads!

Don't forget to reply to next week's mailbag!

-SV

Mailbag: Week of 4-09-05
What has been the highlight of 2005 for you?
Weird yankees

Getting a job and finishing off shotgun have been my top two things this year. I'll take come pictures of me and staty walking around terrorising the villagers in Minnasota for you guys.

Hopefully some day I'll get the cash to fly down and visit you and soapr

-Rick


While you're at it why don't you guys egg a house for soapr and me? And aren't you glad now that one random day your cat decided to steal you waffles?

-SV

All hail...

The highlight of 2005 for me has been when I created my own religion. GSGoldianity has been fairly successful. It's been listed as a cult, but come on, the $50 a week fee is necessary to support the church! And it's your fault if you leave! Nevermind...but come join, it's a lot of fun, I assure you.

-GSGold


To mailbag viewers: thedailypos.org doesn't not, in any way, form, or fashion, support this "religion." If anything happens to you involving this "religion", it's not our fault. If you come whining to us we'll just throw you back out onto the streets, you stupid hobos.

-SV

It's all fun and games until someone gets eaten by a giant otter.

I'd say about 30 seconds ago when the TV said "Hey look, giant otters!" it was pretty funny. And in all honesty, I can't remember any further back then that. I am pretty sure it's been a fairly good year so far though.

-stareyE


I guess as long as nothing bad happens it's okay.

-SV

Fight the power!

A few months ago I actually turned in an essay for AP lit two days before it was due. I got an A. :D

I must fight procrastination, one step at a time. This is like the best thing I've done this year, seriously.

-Soapy


*sigh*...I, too must fight procrastination, especially now that I'm about to go to college. It's not just any college either; Emory is one of the toughest schools to get into in Georgia. I need to pick it up or I just might be left behind.

Congrats on turning in something early; last time I did that was...never.

-SV

Cheers

I'm not sure about 2005, but it seems to be a good year for POS so far. Am I wrong in thinking the forums are more active than ever?

Heres to a good rest of the year. whoop.

-Anti


It may be that we just have new forums that has everyone excited, but there is still life in POS. I think that as long as everyone does their part and contributes to POS (even in small ways) the site will never die.

-SV

This week in review.

So no one's done anything truly amazing like jump off a cliff and survived. I've enjoyed the year so far...it looks promising.

Don't forget to reply to next week's mailbag!

-SV

Mailbag: Week of 4-02-05
What is this week's topic?
You can't get anything by this guy

April Fools! Yes, this week's topic is about April Fool's day, and how you will be celebrating this special day that was almost my birthday. Seriously, I'm really ticked that I decided to wait nine more days after almost being born on April 1st.

I will be traveling to Nova Scotia (a province next to New Brunswick) for the weekend, where I will be sure to make a public nuisance of myself. Hurray!

-stareyE


Happy almost birthday! Anyways, this week's topic WOULD have been about April Fool's because I would have been too lazy to come up with a topic that didn't pertain to it. Unfortunately it wouldn't have involved celebrating your birthday because you're white. But this week's topic ISN'T about April Fool's Day. YOU LOSE FOOL!

-SV

BRUCE LEE CHAN!

Shoveing
Loveing
Hopeing
Slaping
Stingging
Rollerskateing
Dr. Marioing

Which one is misspelled?

-StarKirby


None of them are misspelled, but they are all spelled incorrectly (except for the last one because it's not really a word).

And none of them are this week's topic, either.

-SV

I know yer name!

This week's topic is a load of bullocks, that's what it is.

-Krem


I know a guy with the last name Bullock. I can't really imagine a load of Bullocks...
...
...
...
...
whoa, maybe I can. I shouldn't do that. Inference should tell you whether or not it was this week's topic.

-SV

Eww...XP

Yes, the answer to "WTF?" will change depending on how heavy the microvortexes rotate within a .5 micron area.

Anyhow, utilizing my newest Awesometron 769XP Karate Edition, this weeks topic is about Fruit Loops and what flavors people would want in them.

Personally I'd love a grape soda flavored fruit loop.

-GSGold


Crap, there goes my idea for next week's topic.

-SV

DING! DING! DING!

Simple, the answer is "What is this week's topic?" That is the topic.

-Static2007


I guess I'm not tricky enough for you Ms. Nota! You win first prize in the "people who don't look too deep" category. CONGRATULATION!(S)

-SV

Hardcore.

How am I supposed to know what this weeks topic is?

-Allthesmallthings


Well, there's enough people that respond to mailbag regularly that it's likely that one of you might know what this week's topic is. I was taking a chance with the topic this week. It's a new idea in the mailbag industry; it's called "extreme mailbag." You take risks to make mailbag more exciting. You punch bears and skydive without a parachute, except you really don't and just tell people you did. It's really fun, as my lack of exclamation points vindicates. I hope it has you pumped for next week's mailbag; I sure am excited.

-SV

2 for me none for you, punk

OMG THIS IS SO LAST MINUTE :DDDDDDD

This weeks topic is about actually posting! :D Cause apparently I keep forgetting ^_^.

JK actually... it's whatever you want SV ^_^ As long as you share your twix with me :DDD

-UnbrokenTorment


Way to wait until I was in the middle of updating to send in your entry! And you're wrong, the topic isn't about posting. Static already got it right. THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU REPLY LATE! OTHER PEOPLE WIN, NOT YOU! :P

-SV

This week in review.

I'd like to congratulate all our losers this week who guessed something outrageous as this week's "real" topic! I'd also like to remind them that they are still losers because Static is the only winner.

Thus ends this week's edition of EXTREME MAILBAG! (ROCK ON!!!!)

Don't forget to reply to next week's mailbag!

-SV