Pokémon Crystal Version Collabfest

Alright let's get this par-tay on the road. sry 4 delay.

Part whatever the fuck I have no idea anymore.


Alright let's see here!


Let's see wht our team is up to...


And we're in...


Oh yeah, Blackthorn. I think there's a badge to get. Why is it always me?


First, let's... I think I was checking out the boxes but I have no screenshots of me DOING that so w/e


...forget some moves?
Haha no fuck you


...command dragons live right here in BLACKTHORN. As a result, there are many legends about dragons in this town.
I'm sure there are! Too bad we're not listening to any!


I'm sure this Dratini just told me his entire interesting life story. Too bad we don't speak Pokémon speak.


...of BLACKTHORN.
Does noone around here have anything of interest to say?


...for you. However, it would be impossible for a run-of-the-mill trainer to win.
Bitch, I have seven badges.


Dragon gym, alright! Also known as "fuck you, you're not getting type advantage" gym.


I'll show you how tough they are!


Yeah... sure... why not.


Yeah, no real surprise there


Pictured: Probably the wrong Pokémon to have at the front spot when fighting dragons, but...


At least 81 HP is pretty much the perfect amount to have against Dragon Rage because it's a guaranteed you can take two hits.


Then that Pokémon faints because you didn't swap it out. Yep.


But, yeah: Perfect amount of HP


Aaaaand another one.


This turned out to be a horrible idea.


This wasn't much better.


This, however, came to define my strategy for the rest of the gym.


As said


Yep. Fuck you.


Back to heal!


Back to gym!


Oh god, rock pushing puzzle


Oh hi.


...past me! CLAIR would be livid if I did!
Too bad for you I have a name then.


Insert Touhou reference here


Dragon. Sure.


Smokescreen never did much to me during this whole gym.


Twister was a little annoying though.


Still, only one Pokémon. Won't do much against me.


You sure fucking did

Also, because of a screenshot not taken (apparently)
It's not like we...

Then what the fuck are you doing in this gym you bum


Oh I am laughing


Let's see what we can do about that


Bang.


And bang.


Yay!


Maybe you should have thought of that before you became a trainer in a dragon type gym.

Okay let's continue this in the next post.

Yeah whatevs


Okay, this might get...


...eep.


Oh mother fucker


Let's-


Okay let's not


Now you can try to electricity me!


...or that. That works too.


While this kind of didn't.


No idea what I was thinking anymore


Ow ow ow


Yeah, fuck dragons.


Just fucking trying everything I can think of at this point.


That ALMOST worked, at least.


This didn't at all.


Better.


Still, ow.


Well...


Heeeeeeal


(etc)


A'ight, let's push some rocks.


Yep.


Clear path to Clair!


Oh wait maybe not


They are full of life energy. If you're not serious, you won't be able to beat them.
Good thing I'm SUPER SERIOUS


Let's rock.


And roll.


:status effects:


:D


Yeah why not


Good ol' Stomp.


Oh shits


Fairly alright.


Close one!


Yep.


Wheeeee


Healing!


Alright, let's do this thing!


Actually, let's do this thing in the next post.

The world's best dragon master. I can hold my own even against the POKÉMON LEAGUE's ELITE FOUR. Do you still want to take me on? ...Fine. Let's do it! As a GYM LEADER, I will use my full power against any opponent!
Eep.


AAAH THE WORLD TURNED PINK


This is going to hurt so fucking much.


She has four Pokémon. I had problems against a SINGLE Dragonair earlier.

Why me?


Let's go for this here tried and true strategy.


Oh fuck yes.


Oh FUCK yes.


Let's see if we can get a repeat of that.


...apparently not aaaaaaaaaaaahhhh


How about this, then?


Hahaha fuck you.


Oh, motherfucker.


MOTHERFUCKER.


Whelp


Sad story short.


Likewise.


Good thing I have a lot of healing items.


Guh.


This SHOULD probably have been the part where I should have realized this weren't going to go all that well.


...right.


Why did I think I could do anything with this? She still has two Pokémons left after this.


Okay, that was good.


Whelp...


Oh OW OW OW OW OW


Status effects


Good. Now do that agai-


Okay don't


At least there's this.


I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING


Argh.


Let's try you again.


Or maybe not.


Why did I not fucking give up at this point? Why did I not give up a pile of healing items ago?


Continuing the trend of "Fuck you"


I'm crying on the inside.


My Pokémons are crying on the outside because on the outside they are in a lot of pain.


Oh, hey, a hit.


Okay, only one left. I CAN DO THIS.


(spoilers: I couldn't)


My everything hurts.


Okay, let's give that another go, Kingdra is part water after all.


Sadly.


etc...


This is not a pleasant sight.


And... yep, apparently no screenshots were taken of the last blows, but all my Pokémon fainted. All my healing items were depleted.

...


Let's try that again.

In the next post.

But first, let's go back and regroup a bit.


This was a terrible idea, but the only ice type we had.


This was a fantastic idea.


Better stock up even more extra.


Bought a bunch.


Alright.


Let's do this again.


(go back and read the text under the first image in the last post now)


That went well!


That went less well!


But yeah the idea here was to spend the HP of these other ones on the early Pokémons so I could save my big gun for when it was needed.


Yesssssss


Alright, motherfucker. Let's do this.


Pictured: The exact moment I fell in love with Dragon Rage


Fuck you.


Not sure what exactly I tried to accomplish here, but...


Yeah, I don't even have any screenshotf of Swinub getting owned.


This one's only a meat shield.


Needed to do this, see.


But let's have some fun.


Okay, why not


Fight!


Eh, I can take that.


Oh god that hurts a bit more though


This is going well!


Alright! Not pictured: It's down to red HP!


Also not pictured: Clair using a motherfucking Full Heal


Let's try that again...


And so on, and so on, until


BANG, MOTHERFUCKERS


TAKE THAT, BITCH


You sure fucking did, so now hand over that badge!


I may have lost, but you're still not ready for the POKÉMON LEAGUE. I know. You should take the dragon user challenge. Behind this GYM is a place called DRAGON'S DEN. There is a small shrine at its center. Go there. If you can prove that you've lost your lazy ideals, I will recognize you as a trainer worthy of a GYM BADGE!
Clair?

Did you know something?

I hate you so fucking much.


Sigh...


Well, healing is the first priority.


Oh I am SO not in the fucking mood for this. He's on Route 35 and wants to battle if anyone gives a shit.


I did... something. I don't remember what.


Well, let's see what's out here.


Oh, look. A target for my rage. Magikarp, you are now an avatar of Clair.


And this is an avatar of me punching Clair in her stupid fucking face. (that was an Apocalypse Johto reference)


...and trouble afoot


He said some more things I didn't care about.


I am here why


Oh god I am SO not in the mood for more dragon trainer bullshit right now


But your fucking bitch of a gym leader invited me


Why is the world pink again


Oh god.

Darin.

Oh god.

So many jokes I could make about that name but noone would get them.


Well...


Hehee


AND ONE FOR CLAIR.


Yeah, fuck you.


...MASTER of our dragon-user clan. You're not allowed to just go in!
But Clair TOLD ME to go in and wait Clair isn't the master?

Okay you know what seriously no I don't want to deal with any more dragon trainer bullshit


Take it away, Gamma!

This should be the right save file???????

Glad to see SIDEKICK getting so much action. Kingler is one of my faves and is a great mid-game pokémon.

...honestly, I don't want to be harsh, but that was somewhat of a weak post. You got way too involved in the nitty-gritty of the battle; play-by-play isn't that interesting at all.

Nah, you're mostly right. I just really didn't feel like playing any more after all that, and due to my catastrophic first showdown with Clair, I had 500 screenshots of which the majority was the gym. I didn't have much else to work with. Plus I had to suffer through all of that so I don't see why you shouldn't have to :V

Oh well we're only three players on the list right now so it'll be my turn to try to have a playing session that doesn't suck again soon.

screenshots are taken, all that's left is to put them together and all that fun stuff

you can expect an update sometime in the next few days if you bug me about it on #melee

where are we again I am laughing


I'm not that great at pokemon stats and all, so whoever goes next can give this to someone I guess.


hi im daisy


yeah they were wicked easy







Am I supposed to know who that is???


its a whorlpool

I don't know what to do with this so w/e


oh sorry did I interuppt something :o


I am laughing I'm dumb


pictured: the point where I remembered how pokemon works


A shrine honoring the dragon POKéMON said to have lived in DRAGON'S DEN.


uhhh


looks like this is the only way around


this ought to do the trick


I hope nobody wanted to keep this, because I'm getting rid of it

crap I'm not prepared for a battle


No need to explain why you came. CLAIR sent you here, didn't she? That girl is a handful... I am sorry, but I must test you.

no stop I need to go to a pokecenter
I want my lawyer

Not to worry, you are to answer only a few questions.

wat

Ready?


Not sure what the difference between pal and friend is, but I'll go with friend.


my dazzling good looks


he says this after every goddamn question


I want this so that my pokemon die more often, you see




"all you need is ____"


I guess???


that's different :o

You care deeply for POKéMON. Very commendable. That conviction is important! DAISY, don't lose that belief. It will see you through at the POKéMON LEAGUE.


who is this douchebag

So how did it go? I guess there's no point in asking. You did fail? .......................................What? You passed? That can't be! You're lying! Even I haven't been approved!


This child is impeccable, in skill and spirit!



Admit defeat and confer the RISINGBADGE! ...Or must I inform LANCE of this?



DAISY received RISINGBADGE. RISINGBADGE will enable your POKéMON to use the move for climbing waterfalls.

this will sure get a lot of use

Also, all POKéMON will recognize you as a trainer and obey your every command without question

so you can use them as your PERSONAL SLAVES


Reflect upon what it is that you lack and this child has.


rage quit


yeah okay


Here, take this as my apology. DAISY received TM24. That contains DRAGONBREATH. No, it doesn't have anything to do with my breath. If you don't want it, you don't have to take it. What's the matter? Aren't you going on to the POKéMON LEAGUE? Do you know how to get there? From here, go to NEW BARK TOWN. Then SURF east to POKéMON LEAGUE. The route there is very tough. Don't you dare lose at the POKéMON LEAGUE! If you do, I'll feel even worse about having lost to you! Give it everything you've got.





I don't need that dumb item finding crap


I may not know much about pokemon, but this was obvious.


I have something for you. Could you swing by my LAB? See you later!

one fly later...


research is going great! Take this as a token of my appreciation. DAISY received MASTER BALL. The MASTER BALL is the best! It's the ultimate BALL! IT'll catch any POKéMON without fail. It's given only to recognized POKéMON researchers. I think you can make much better use of it than I can, DAISY!

Isn't that like using god mode powers only give to the game developer?

:cheatin:

Now, I just have to surf east, right?  The map says there's nothing over there, but...


oh


oh no


oh man, oh god


oh god, oh man, oh GOD, OH MAN


I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER HAVE TO SEE THIS PLACE AGAIN


but yeah, there's nothing interesting here


except maybe this

which I'm not sure even has any use at this point


boring caves, ep. 57





Are you training on your own?


noooob


oop


that should do it


oh, for crying out loud

these ledge tiles have too much space on the top side of them.  I keep trying to go up to the edge and just jump right off


i love being STRONG


Clearly you are not STRONG


Yeah this girl was pretty easy too.


welcome to another exciting episode of: mom buys things with my money!

let's just skip this and see what we get


this looks like an incredibly useful item that I will be sure to use!


I got it! You're on the POKéMON LEAGUE challenge!

actually...


suddenly, daylight!


[size=16]I'm impressed. But you're not satisfied by just collecting them, right?[/size]

Heck no, you can make way more money forging copies of them and selling them on the black market!


wait a second...

anyway, nothing interesting happens for a while, bug catcher arnie calls, I don't get an ice berry because the PACK is full, etc etc


But only once you obtain all three triforces can you defeat the mother brain


this guy sure knows how to pick his pokemon!


for the POKéMON LEAGUE. I hear that the LEAGUE's ELITE FOUR are tougher than GYM LEADERS.

:vidoe game:

this looks like the right


gotta pick up trash first


aw man, I didn't think I would have to fight in here too


uhhh


The ELITE FOUR are so strong it's scary, and they're ready for you!


You'll see scary-strong POKéMON out there
w/e I beat zelda II


we seem to have reached the obligatory "cave of many choices"





I'm not sure what I got rid of to make room for the hp up, but I don't think it was the ethers


have you ever played that game chutes and ladders


this reminds me of it


I think I gave this to geodude or something


aw snap


ew, not this guy again


Are you going to take the POKéMON LEAGUE challenge?

no I just came in here for the view


whoops I am laughing

You're so much weaker than I am. I'm not like I was before. I now have the best and strongest POKéMON with me. I'm invincible! DAISY! I challenge you!


augh pink


MY EYES


huh


basically this keeps happening, and waluigi, having no concept of type advantages whatsoever, is slaughtered


I gave it everything I had... What you possess, and what I lack... I'm beginning to understand what that dragon master said to me.

was it perhaps "hire a better programmer?"


on becoming the greatest trainer... I'm going to find out why I can't win and become stronger... When I do, I will challenge you. And I'll beat you down with all my power. ...Humph! You keep at it until then.


I won't be holding my breath

So where do we want to go from here?  There isn't much left, so we can probably just finish it up if whoever is next wants to.

I'll probably pick this up late weekend early next week?

These posts were the first time I ran across the lol -> "I am laughing" wordfilter in action. It is glorious.

I wonder how many tries Clair has had at those questions and what her answers were...

Delays may be incurred by new computer and sudden explosion of people coming to POS and wanting to play new games with my new computer and new shit.

Although SK's router exploded or something so who knows.

alright vba closing by itself while i play it, awesome, time to throw 30 more balls at suicine again