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Ported from the old forum via script. Let the legend continue!

[Spoiler]

All our best friends are here!



Hey, remember that one picture with Ditto in it?



Not gonna bother going back and getting the animation but the Ditto transforms into the Game Freak logo and then the words pop up.



A



A field



IH



Didn't catch this either but a shadow rushes by and Wooper (!!!!!!!!!!!) and Pichu (not !) pop up and wonder what the hey that was all about!






UWGTBSL... and that's assuming I didn't miss one because they were going so fast. Not that there's a vowel you could insert that'd make it a real word.



WHO'S THAT POKEMON? Spoiler: it's Suicune



Suicune leaps into the air and is met by its mortal enemy: the letter F.



"Not in the mood, F. Kindly F off."

Spoiler for Hidden:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Alright, slightly different group here...

BTWESHUG

Looks like garble to me. But what if you rearrange the letters?

WEB THUGS

That's right. Staring down none other than the Web Thugs. This is the story of Suicune's struggle to overcome online bullying. I hope everything goes well for our hero!



CRYSTAL... wait, I know what that spells!



Welcome, everyone, to the latest collabfest... :pokemon: Crystal Version! We're gonna have ourselves a good time in the coming weeks/months, so everyone buckle your seatbelts! Yeehaw!

Don't have many... OPTIONs here! But we can at least set some options first...



Fast text for sure. Also, does anyone use this frame type? Anyone at all?



Maybe someone else will change the frame type later. It won't be me though. Also, changing the sound to stereo for the best the Game Boy has to offer.



I've never played Crystal version before. Just Gold and Silver. So I've never seen the girl character for this generation in action. Plus, picking the girl is the cool thing to do, right? Right?



I'm sorry.



This is the part where I set the in-game clock. It's always accurate because none of the players involved in this are in different timezones. Oh wait.

WHOA! SEVEN MINUTES? DUUUUDE THAT'S A LOT OF MINUTES



Oak gives his spiel. It hasn't really changed.



They did pick a better pokemon to show off in this segment though! :wooper:



Every day.



SO HERE IS THE PART YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR, RIGHT? Man, wouldn't it be lame if I picked a default name for this?



memes ftw



I could have. Maybe I should have.



We could make this a story about a real POSer...



...or a real poser...



...or we could even reference a pokemon nuzlocke comic our own SABERinBLUE is making!



We could go cross-community...



...or dip into the Starfox quote reservoir. But in the end, there's one true choice to make.



We're going to be meeting a lot of people, so let's name ourselves after the master of introducing herself.



This stupid crap still happens.



Here we are, in our very own bedroom! Time to check things out.



Nobody ever writes... :cry:



Might as well put the bed away since we won't be using it.



Here's eight scrubs we can look forward to putting on ice.



My favorite one is "Draw Every Pokemon".



IT SURE IS



There is nothing interesting on the radio.



Professor Elm is looking for me! Grr... I bet this is about the toilet paper I threw on his house last night, isn't it?



POKeGEAR... because everything is named after pokemon.



If only I had started this two days sooner. If only...



No, but it probably will be before we're done playing this game! :tehe:



Someone is visiting? I don't even know who this person is. Mom, quit letting strangers into the house! It scares me...



You can probably your mom joke this if you try hard enough.



Oh man, I remember Cinnabar Island from the old games! I wonder how that place is doing?

Anyway, time to stop exploring our pad and head outside.

After all the hard work Daisy went through receiving her bed, you just up and put it away?  :cry:

Wait, there aren't just 151? Holy shit.



It was like a bomb went off in my head at this revelation. :pow:



This Elm fellow must be a real genius! I can't wait to meet him.



Oh heeeey your pokegear is impressive did your MOM get it for youSHUT UP YOU CONDESCENDING CUNT.



Wow... look at all the gadgets and doodads...



Your stupid face, stupid.



Well now. Fine, be that way, prick.

Time to go in the lab and see what he's looking at.



Hey Elm, that's a handsome set of pokeballs you have on that table over there.




What's in it for me? I don't have time to study pokemon every day like you professor types do.



Oh, just copy from Wikipedia. That'll do it.



Curious things. Like Mewthree... does it really exist? Or what do pokemon have against short grass? Or who is that red-haired fellow masturbating outside the window over there?



Dog you KNOW I'm all about those free mons.



"Whoa, a Nigerian prince wants to enlarge my penis and all I have to do is give him my bank account information!"



What advice do you have for me today, Navi? You're just in time... I've been having trouble opening the door to my house.



"Dude fucking loves POKeMON like you wouldn't believe."




Oh, it's real this time? So it's not some gargbage about Bat Boy again?



Anyway tl;dr he tells us to go visit Mr. Pokemon for him and to take one of these three with me.



Three compelling choices. Which do I take? You'll have to wait and see!

I got this guy's phone number. I will never ever call him.



This guy game me a potion on the way out. Thanks, guy. When I use this potion I'll be sure to think of you.



Oh, they added little signs to tell you where you are in this version. Cool!



Could be like... in a minute... or two minutes...



OR A FEW STEPS AWAY



I didn't capture it here but the pokemon in this game have little animations when they show up. This was the first time they did that. They would then go on to do it in Emerald and Platinum before finally making it a regular thing with Black and White. :teach:



Go! ODDISH!

...

...



I'm sorry, everyone. I dun goofed. I can explain though! See...



Back here, I thought I was being given the wrong pokemon because of the picture. It said CHIKORITA but it had a picture of ODDISH? So I thought I'd correct the game's mistake. I'm sorry, everyone.



Back to this battle... it was kind of rough. The rattata was fierce! I have a secret comeback plan though.




Take that, guy who gave me the potion!



No it can't...



Not this shit again, oh no!



It's a while before I'll be doing that, buddy!



Protip: every few hours, set your clock back to the beginning of the night cycle so this guy has to wait forever and eventually dies of starvation. You've killed man with the power of time! Are you proud of yourself, murderer?



HI, BERRY!



Guess ODDISH can have her berry back.



This guy actually lets you say no to him! If you say yes he drags you around town and tells you things you already know.



It's free but it's closely monitored ever since the day some smartass set the wallpaper to goatse.



After the game decides it's alright for me to have more pokemon than my starter. :holyshit:



I buy my usual starter pack: 2 'dotes, a paralyz heal, an awakening, and 2 potions.



"You better fucking do it, noob. Do you want to be a noob forever? No? Then move your ass and get those BADGES."



Are you, now?



Keep believing that'll make you gym material, kid.



Yep, and turned him down.



Hm, do we want the map? Yeah, why not.



The "GUIDE GENT" takes me around town and I learn nothing new. Then I get the map. Yeehaw.



Onward!

This is something that wasn't in gold/silver! Wags on route 30!




hahahaha what a lame noob



Level 6 get! And here are the stats if you like looking at stats. What nice stats wow those are cool stats.



A little redundant now with the pop-up signs when you go to new places?



Oh I guess there is this.



HI, BERRY!



Cool...



I sure am getting berries.



Aw yeah, enough wags and rats, here's a REAL man's pokemon!



Not about to get my ass poison stung, sorry.



Give 'em hell!



Big battles do not contain rattatas. Sorry.



Might as well fight one of these since I have berries...



HI, PSNCUREBERRY!



Hi, I'm Daisy!



whoa... a egg :egg:



Hi, I'm Daisy!



He says a bunch of words and gives me the pokedex! It's a hi-tech encyclopedia!

Anyway, let's get outta here...




Sounds like trouble! I hope he didn't burn the toast again!



:!!!:



Go ... yourself.



I don't get what you're saying!



No! I don't get it!



Ohhhh, I see.



What is this striking gentleman's name? We'll find out soon enough.



His Cyndaquil is bad at using Leer. That's about all that happens this entire fight.



yep :proud:





And then he runs off. He must be in a hurry to be the very best, like no one ever was!



No it's not...



Good attack for a level 8 pokemon.



TEAM ROCKET, I KNEW IT



Oh, never mind. It was that guy. Yeah, I know his name...



Let's get the other "sports games" Mario character involved.



I gave him the egg and he's all WOW OOH AHH OH YOU GOT A POKEDEX WOW THAT'S AMAZING YOU MUST HAVE IT IN YOU TO BE THE CHAMPION GO GET THE BADGES GLHF OH TALK TO YOUR MOM BEFORE YOU GO



I received poke ball.



BALL POCKET



And mom will save money for me... whenever I win a battle, a portion of the winnings go to her instead. She'll occasionally spend it on items too which might make for funny commentary later!



And we're off on the journey of a lifetime! End my turn. :)

And here's my save file for whoever is next in line~

(just put in the same folder as the rom and open the rom and it should let you continue from my save)

Pokemon Crystal the Imagefest part two
Wherein Daisy makes an ass out of herself.


(04:47:02) (@KennyMan666) Whelp I'll do this in the morn'

And as we can see, it's clearly MORN now.


This is what Soap left us off with!


This is where Soap left us off!


I quickly realize I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing, but left looks like a good suggestion.


Route 29, always a solid choice.


I missed to screenshot it but this guy goes !


"How many :pokemon: have you caught? Would you like me to show you how to catch :pokemon:?"
Yes
> No
"Oh. Fine, then. Anyway, if you want to catch :pokemon:, you have to walk a lot."

Thanks for the advice! We totally already know how to catch :pokemon:, as you will see in this update, so I told him to fuck off!


I have not traveled far before my first random encounter! What is it? What will we battle?


...wait...


Oh my god. Oh my god yes.

I know what to do.


Two tackles from ODDISH later, this is a perfect situation.


Go!


C'mon c'mon c'mon...


Yes! Our first :pokemon:!


Thank you, Pokedex!


Yes. A thousand times yes.


The only choice.


Jumping off ledges is fun!


Too bad it's not emo so it would be already gone by now!


Oh fuck you ledge.


We'll have to go around.


And through some grass!


Oh hey! It's a... it's a...


Fuckin' Pidgey.


Boring story short, one razor leaf.


Why me?


This is relevant to my interests.


...the basket or else Daisy gets the hose again.


The route is pretty uneventful, and then I found a house.


Noone in the house really says anything of any value.


The fourth wall is weak with this one. I kill a Pidgey on the way.


Fuck off, BERRY.


Oh look, a city!


Let's stock up a little.


This guy might possibly be important later.


Especially the Krem badge.


"What's an evolution?" - Andy


Gotta make sure to stay healed.


Click here for FREE* :pokemon:


Okay, that's enough for one post, will type up another! Right now!

Better do this so BIOSPARK doesn't die!


Gotta put some EXP on him, so he goes in front.


This sounds familiar!


Fuck off, BERRY.


Oh my god!


Oh my! It's a...


Another fuckin' Pidgey, but I wanted to give EXP to BIOSPARK!


Oops.


Good thing I gave him that berry!


It gets down to low red HP and for some reason I decide to catch it.


Why did I do this again? There's better FLY slaves out there.


I could do this. But that would fit better for when we get a Murkrow.


I come up with nothing so eventually I name it POXNOR as a joke.


This happens. I half wanted to catch a Ledyba but they never landed at catch-friendly HP.


My team doesn't feel all that well! I need a Pokemon center!


Well, this is a thing.


He goes on to say nothing of value.


Fuck off, PSNCUREBERRY.


:!!!: :!!!: :!!!:


Alright, now you drop your HP to...


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
:cry:

Weedle encounter rate on Route 31 in Silver: 30%
Weedle encounter rate on Route 31 in Crystal: 5%
:shakeafist:


Saddened by the lost Weedle, Daisy and Oddish forges on, and take out their anger on a Ledyba, which makes Oddish level up!


Statistics!


...oh for fuck's sake I've walked in a circle


Up and left, got it.


:!!!:


"...more Pokemon. Wait! You look weak! Come on, let's battle!"


Them's fighting words. Weak? Me?


And it's not just any trainer!


Send out what?


Oh look. It's a Rattata.


As if.


"...order to battle better? No! I'm sticking with this one no matter what!"
After taking a terrible trainer decision, Joey tries putting on the smooth moves.


um how about no you creep


Oh. Well. Uh.
> Yes
No


I'll come to regret this later, I just know it.


That's how it works.


Funny how you look identical to Joey.


Haha... hahahhaha.... hahahhaha.


Scenes of unnecessary yet hilarious violence against Pokemon of a far lower level cut out.


I honestly find it improbable that you ever won anything in your entire life.


'kay


...the abyss will stare back at you.


You're not Weedle, therefore you die.


Yay!


Goddamnit.

More of this guy in the next post!

Good for you.


Bug catcher :don:


He lives to get a few hits in! Oh my god! How will this end?


...like this, of course.


We advance!


What fun critters await us at route 31?


More Ledybas. I fought a bunch I didn't screenshot as well.


"If Pokemon could light it up, I'd explore it."


It sure is a cave. And dark. And I'm sure there's a million fucking Zubats in there and I really don't feel like dealing with that.


Free stuff!


"I walked too far today looking for Pokemon. My feet hurt and I'm sleepy... If I were a wild Pokemon, I'd be easy to catch... ...Zzzz..."
Are you really sure you're not a Snorlax?


Fuck off, BITTER BERRY.


Oh joy.


...oh, yeah, they're not healed yet. ODDISH, my trust is in you!


This guy actually has four Pokemon! How will this go?


Two level 2 Caterpies fall like they're nothing.


But then!


Oh god ow ow ow


OW OW OW


Phew!


I'm legitimately glad he didn't have two Weedles.


Yay!


Next time you should maybe not have three level 2 Caterpies in your team!


All better.


Oh, hey, nice.


Lots of grass!


Fuck off.


I think we've reached the end of the route!


How the fuck would I have done that when I entered from the east and Sprout Tower is to the west?


First stop in Violet City!


Alright, now to figure out what to do.


Pff, I'm a Pokemon expert already.


This looks relevant to our interests.


I decide to give it a shot! After all, I have three Pokemon!


And this guy only has one! How bad could it be?


...oh fuck fuck fuck


Fuck fuck fuck


Despite working with the worst starter I somehow get through that but dear gods I'll have to do a tactical retreat for now.


Thanks, Joy!


Oh for fuck's sake.

"Yo, DAISY! How're you doing? This is JOEY, got a minute?"
(No)
"How are your Pokemon doing? My RATTATA's raring to go, just like always. It's the only one I have. I'm going to become a great trainer with it!"
(Yeah sure)
"Oh yeah, I saw a wild LEDYBA! I thought about going for it, but I decided to work with my one-and-only right to the extreme end."
(What does that even mean)
"All right. Later!"

I let him get my phone number why?

Okay, let's see. I'm too weak to take down a Flying-type gym right now. Flying is strong against Grass.

Hmm.


A plan is formed. It requires a Bellsprout.


And I thought I knew just where to find one.

(To Be Continue)

Amazing!


We head up and find this guy!


Well, I wanted a Bellsprout, but...


Alrighte!


Still need some EXP on this guy.


And maybe this guy.


And fuck your type advantage.


Well, that worked out!


You're not a Bellsprout!


You're also not a Bellsprout! It was then I figured out there's no actual wild Bellsprouts in Sprout Tower. Oops!


But I learned where to find them!


You're not a Bellsprout.


You're not a Bellsprout, but you'r a funny-looking little thing.


He does this like three times.


But in the end, it goes home with me.


Right!


It's a red round thing! Not angry enough, though.


This is what we'll go with.


We draw ever closer to :furretavatar:.


A few stupid encounters later, this happens! Finally!


Alright, let's just-


Oh ow ow ow potion time


Much better!


Heart of the cards! Can't kill it!


Perfect!


We actually don't care about this.


I have a good reason for this.


What now?


Fuck off, Joey.

He's ready to battle at route 30, though, if anyone wants to take him up on that.

Well, I think this post is running long now. Should be just one more post!

We head back into Violet City, plan in hand. Also Bellsprout.


Fuck off, PRZCUREBERRY.


The plan.


And remember that you can't change the nickname of traded Pokemon :evil:


Sure.


Bye!


Excellent!


A level 5 Onix named ROCKY holding a bitter berry. This guy will be key!


So we head back.


Oh no reality is breaking down


Damn straight it isn't, motherfucker


Traded Pokemon get boosted EXP gain. This allows ROCKY to go to level 6 from a single level 7 Pidgey!


See?

However, I find that level 5 is not enough. I am not ready for Falkner yet.


Let's go heal, and let's go train.


:!!!: :!!!: :!!!:

WHAT DO WE FIND IF NOT ANOTHER WEEDLE


Oh god, this is bad. Another tackle and it's going to die.


I try anyway.


I try again, and somehow I have no screenshots of me throwing like 5 balls at it but it breaking free all the time.


Likewise, I seem to have no screenshots of the Bellsprout that vine whipped Rocky to death.


Oh my god.


We get a better health to try with... and... and...


GENTLEMEN.


Like we here at The Daily POS doesn't already know everything about !


Naturally.


We have a full team now, but we're not ready yet!


A short training montage later, ROCKY grows to level 9 and...

...doesn't learn Rock Throw.

Because I was looking at the Generation V moveset table.

Goddamnit, Kenny, why are you such an idiot.


I decide to fucking go for it anyway. A full team, with a rock-type and a level 12 Chikorita with Razor Leaf, what could go wrong?
(he says, knowing full well two grass-types and a bug-type, as well as two severely under-leveled normal types, are enough cause to worry)


"People say you can clip flying-type Pokemon's wings with a jolt of electricity... I won't allow such insults to bird Pokemon! I'll show you the real power of the magnificent bird Pokemon!"


I put ODDISH in front to just kind of smash the Pidgey, and save ROCKY's HP.


Not sure what I was worried about, it went down easily. And level!


I wasn't worried at this point.


There's a screenshot or two missing here. I really thought I had taken them. I switched in ROCKY. Pidgeotto started mudslapping me, which wasn't only super effective, but lowered accuracy. Got hits in. Switched in Oddish. Got smacked around. Switched in BIOSPARK to meatshield.


That went poorly.


Switched in SOAPRMAN just so I could throw a potion to ODDISH.


I'm sorry, Soap! It'll never happen again!


At this point, ROCKY's accuracy has been destroyed to the point where he's not worth using anymore. Razor Leaf might not be very effective, but it deals damage and seemed to have a high chance to hit even with lowered accuracy.


Some healing and praying later, I emerge victorious.


In retrospect, I should have done Sprout Tower instead of the gym to build levels. Oops!


"...Darn! My dad's cherished bird Pokemon... All right. Take this. It's the official POKEMON LEAGUE ZEPHYRBADGE."


get! Raises attack power, lets us use FLASH, etc.

We also get TM31!


Maybe something we can use!


I was planning on ending the update right after stepping outside the gym, but then I get a phonecall! And it's not that silly Joey this time!


Maybe I could...


...but maybe I could leave that to the next person! Good god I promise that my future parts will be much much much shorter. Sorry for this being so long.

BADGES:

Aaaaand here's the save file. Goes in the same folder as the game.

Taking Falkner before the tower. That's some hardcore shit right there. But for some reason I remember his levels being higher in gold/silver? Did they lower them for crystal?